My Big Brother

I have five sisters. Five. That’s a loaded sentence I know. And there are definitely a lot of stories I can (and eventually will) tell about growing up in the middle of six girls. Our family has a fascinating story. One that I’m sure will always echo in whatever I write. But that’s not really what I’m writing about today. Anyway, that’s me on end (right side).

Me and My Sisters (L to R Bethany, Allison, Camille, Madison, Ashley, me)

   What I’m writing about today is my brother. I don’t have a brother by blood, but I’m stuck with him all the same.

Me and Jeff

  My oldest sister Allison is married to a guy named Jeffrey. He’s been around awhile, a little over 10 years or something like that. Basically we’ve both known each other long enough to remember some very awkward fashion phases. For the past few years Jeff’s been dealing with some pretty crazy stuff. In the past few months Jeff and I started working on a blog together. Yesterday, Jeffrey turned himself in to Manatee County Jail in order to serve a 21 month prison sentence. Sunday night we all went bowling together. When he hugged me goodbye he said, “See you in a year and a half.” I told him to stop it… I wasn’t ready to start crying yet.

  I know it’s been a weird week. And I’m sorry that it has all been creeping into this venue. Monday someone close to our family died, Wednesday night they celebrated his life, Wednesday morning my cousin testified in court regarding a case he’s been involved with for the past three years, Thursday during our friend’s funeral my brother-in-law turned himself in and tonight Camille will record her first Demo CD. Life hardly ever is all good or all bad. And I don’t really know all that I’m trying to say here. I just couldn’t let it go by without saying something. It’s strange to officially get a big brother when you’re 23. It’s stranger to realize he won’t be around teasing all of us at family stuff for 21 months.

  Tuesday night I edited his last blog before he turned himself in. It was an optimistic “See ya, later” filled with all his hopes for what he’ll be able to do while in prison. I sat on the couch in our living room and choked back tears as I tried to make my way through it.

  I’m so proud of my big brother.

  Two years ago we sat in their living room and he asked me about how dinosaurs fit into the Bible’s story of creation and how you get into Heaven if you’re essentially a good person. Two nights ago I read about what God has been doing in his life this past year and I was so moved.

  I just keep thinking, “Our story isn’t over yet.” It isn’t over yet.

²⁰ You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.

                                            -Genesis 50:20

** You can start from the beginning of Jeffrey’s story here

**And if you’re the praying kind add our family to your list and Jeffrey especially. I’d much appreciate it.

 

All Things for All People

I was introduced to the phrase “all things for all people” about ten years ago in the auditorium of Covenant College up on a mountain in Tennessee. It wasn’t just a phrase, it was the name of the drama team that was part of the Student Life camp. They really were a little bit of everything: planned comedy in the mornings, serious drama at night, improv during the late night blitz… literally, all things.

Three years ago, when I worked with Student Life I spent a lot of time with the AT2AP actors. They are still some of the most diversely talented people I know. It blew my mind to watch them perform essentially the same things for 12 weeks and bring a level of energy and freshness to each performance. I consider myself a sort of artistic kid and I could appreciate the doors they opened for some of the students to be captured by the message. I know at 14 it was often the drama troupe that spoke more to me… though Wade Davis was a wonderful speaker and I did learn a lot from him as well.

This morning I was spending some time in thought. I’m not sure what that’s like for other people, since I can’t really get into other people’s brains, but for me it’s sort of like wandering through a knick-knack shop filled with all sorts of objects. These objects can range from the things going on in my life, to things I’ve learned recently,  or weird factoids that have gotten caught in my mind, and odd things I’ve imagined that need a home. Contemplation is sort of like wandering through the shop picking up various things until I find one I want to spend some time with.

Today’s object was a conversation I had with a dear friend named Chelsea who recently told me about two very popular food companies that use their resources to fund nefarious projects. If I remember correctly one of our favourite Hummus brands funds the Pakistanis’ fighting effort and a popular fast food chain uses their resources to fund legislation that negatively affects human rights. She was telling me that though she thinks one person abstaining from these two companies will hardly be felt by them it’s something she has to do. It’s called personal integrity, and I’m a fan of it, which I told her.

Since that conversation I’ve been faced with what I will do with this information. I probably won’t buy Sabra hummus anymore. I don’t want to consciously put my money into the hands of someone running a war (I can’t really avoid taxes, though, so there’s that). And if I continue to live a vegetarian lifestyle then I won’t have much cause to go to that fast food restaurant. But it’s more a convenient avoidance than a conscious decision to no longer support them.

The thing is, most places aren’t just what they appear on the  surface; a hummus brand isn’t just a hummus brand, a convenient store isn’t just a convenient store. Sometimes they’re very bad for America, or the family unit, or the collective self-image of teenagers. There are many stores and aspects of our consumer driven society that are much more devious just past the shiny veneer of their first layer. Most days it’s easy to glide along, pretending we’re blissfully unaware of this devious nature. But then something is illuminated, and that “blissful ignorance” is interrupted and a decision must be made. No longer can you be all things to all people. Sometimes you can only be some things for some people.

Today, I will attempt to be an advocate for someone with less rights and resources than me, because were our positions reversed I would hope they would extend the same courtesy. And that’s all I can really do.

 

01.11.11 EDIT: upon suggestion I looked more into the hummus situation. Turns out I was incorrect about which country/fighting effort Sabra was funding. Silly me for not fact checking before word-vomiting. Turns out Sabra supports the “infrastructure of occupation” or two elite branches of the Israeli military that have some shady dealings with the West Bank and have been charged with abusing Palestinian rights. Which, you know brings a whole new level of concern to the whole thing for me. And more contemplation. Here’s something about the boycott and here’s a snapshot of  Sabra’s website from October 31, 2010.

What I said about not wanting to fund a war holds true for not wanting to fund infringement on human rights. I have more control over the things I buy than I do how my taxes are appropriated. Sabra is an Israeli company supporting their own military… sort of like Starbucks and our soldiers. It’s a tricky business. And learning more about this after publishing this post is a good lesson in looking further into issues before creating an opinion.

I will continue to attempt to be an advocate for someone in hopes that were our roles reversed they would do the same for me.