20 things I would rather do than read Anna Karenina

Things I would rather do than read Anna Karenina 

punch in the face

(or as Camille calls it Anna Karenina Karenika Cornucopia Unicorn)

  1. Pick dryer lint out of vomit
  2. Eat snails
  3. Eat snails with ketchup (I loathe ketchup)
  4. Be stuck in an elevator with a vuvuzela quartet
  5. Watch a Nicholas Cage movie
  6. Listen to Justin Bieber AND Rebecca Black AND Nyan Cat on endless repeat
  7. Pet a snake
  8. Have a cat sit on my head
  9. Watch a foosball tournament
  10. See the new Footloose movie
  11. Bleach every square inch of a stranger’s bathroom tile with a toothbrush
  12. Be forced to wear a fluffy pink bunny costume
  13. Watch a SyFy monster movie marathon (or any of their marathons, actually)
  14. Listen to Fran Drescher read children’s fairy tales excitedly
  15. Listen to Bella Swan tell me about her life
  16. Be stabbed in the eyeball (I may be speaking figuratively here)
  17. Run. (I abhor running).
  18. Track down and become best friends with the bully in my fifth grade class who cut my favorourite Jansport backpack.
  19. Listen to an advanced Math lecture
  20. Read my journals from the age of 12 until now into a microphone on a busy street corner

However, I will not do any of these things. I am on page 408 of 982. That’s only 574 pages left. Goodreads says I’ve read 27.25 times that (or 15,644 pages so far in 2011). So I need to stop whining and just get to it.

Wish me luck?

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2 thoughts on “20 things I would rather do than read Anna Karenina

  1. You forgot something pertaining bats. Or listening to out of character employees at Harry Potter World hitting on you. Just saying 🙂

    1. So true. This is by no means a comprehensive list. I’m sure we could come up with many more things that I hate.

      21. Have a bat land in my hair and build a nest.
      22. Have a red-head from Jersey ask me out in Zonko’s AND NOT EVEN PRETEND TO BE A WEASLEY!
      23. Brush my hair.

      I would rather brush my hair than read AK

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